In her life, a woman goes through several roles, and sometimes it can be absolutely crazy. She is born as a daughter and a sister, later she is a friend, a girlfriend, a fiancée or a wife. A bigger change comes with children, when a carefree woman becomes a mother, and I believe that it probably causes havoc later too when a mother becomes a mother-in-law or a grandmother, but I don't know anything about that yet. Luckily...
Anyone who knows me knows that I am a very positive and eternally smiling observer of life. Most of all I love to muse, read, analyse and philosophise. And when I look around me here and now on "maternity leave", I see that mothers experience their role very differently, and their perception of motherhood can be divided into what are for me 3 basic categories. None of them is good or bad. Each brings its pluses and minuses, and depending on the situation women move from one role to another. The basis is common sense and balance; the problem arises when a woman gets "stuck" in one of them for too long..
MOTHER TERESA
The self-sacrificing type of mother. I "borrowed" the label from a great woman who sacrificed her life for others. It is the same with this mother. No, these are not only the ones you see breastfeeding a four-year-old in a sling. They are also the women who buy their children a Burberry trench coat or a romper and themselves walk around in H&M clothes. The ones who take out a loan for nursery school or drive their kids to after-school clubs every day while having no interests or hobbies of their own. The ones who blend smoothies for their children daily and cook with ORGANIC food while they themselves eat irregularly and anything. Basically, any elevating of the child's value above one's own puts a mother in this category. They most often argue that: "children are the meaning of life, who else if not the children, I want them to have a better life than I did, I found myself in it, my children are above-average intelligent, clever, etc.."
CAREER MOTHER
The second role, which is actually very typical of the era we live in. A mother runs back to work after a few months (abroad even weeks). We all know that maternity leave is no walk in the park, and looking after a small crying baby can sometimes take on the proportions of three full-time jobs. For this reason many scurry, even if they never admit it, back to the comfort of their work routine as soon as possible, where they calmly drink coffee with a colleague and chat about everything important. Career mothers cite reasons such as: "I don't want to get completely dumbed down, only women who can't be bothered to work are on maternity leave, and looking after children is surely inferior."
MANAGER MOTHER
The manager mother wants a lot from life, often everything, and of course for herself and for her children too. It ends up that she often has no time for something as tiring as children. Food is the basis, stylish clothes a matter of course, education a necessity, languages of course, and the children's rooms straight out of a catalogue. Mother during the day, wife in the evening, work in between. Is it doable??? It is. With her tongue hanging out and eternally sweaty. She thus involves a wide circle in the children's lives: family, grandmas, grandpas, nurseries, aunts, neighbours, basically just about anybody. After all, social contact is the foundation for children. Other reasons and arguments are: "I'll rest in my grave, I live in the present, children belong to the world..".
So, did you find yourself??? I often fall into the role of the manager mother, and when I'm really about to collapse and the kids are bawling in tandem, it seems like the only way out. Of course it isn't, since everyone has to sort things out with their children themselves, and sometimes boredom is fine too, but I like to solve it this "managerial" way. The most important point at the end: You need to be able to make fun of yourself! When it's not a matter of life and death, it's not a matter at all, and we are here after all to learn. Preferably from our own mistakes. Above all, please don't stand behind your mistakes.
I believe my sense of humour and irony will mostly be understood and that I won't offend anyone with this article, even though it may hold up a mirror to many.
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I thank the talented photographer Lenka Imrichová for the beautiful photos. Dress: ZARA, Sunglasses: Stradivarius, Handbag: Mango, Leather sandals: CCC Shoes&Bags, pram: BabyZen YOYO, Feedo.sk
